Internet Guardian

Posts Tagged ‘Dating’

If you wont let a stranger into your car, why let him into your heart?

You finally found that someone special!

Since you met, they email you daily. They seem loving and caring. They are a good listener. They appeal to your way of life, and they appear to be that perfect fit for your taste and personality. Children? Animals? They want children, they love your animals, what more could you want?

You think you may be soulmates. But before you go any further, think about this: They may be an online predator, one of thousands of con artists and sexual predators crawling Internet dating sites for hopeful romantics just like you. They have victimized others by stealing their trust, hearts and their money. And now they are after you… there are some horrible people hiding in the shadows looking to capitalize off of your hope and trust.

Did they tell you they have money, or claimed they are a lawyer or an executive. They may have bragged about their business or their waterfront estate. They said they have never had financial difficulty or had any liens and judgments against them. Is there a history of criminal behavior or are they a sexual predator? Could they be lying?

Love is blind, but you do not have to be.

Don’t become another statistic… For the price of a dinner out, you can order your “Peace of Mind” from background search specialist. They can thoroughly examine their private and professional background along with any criminal records. A good background investigation includes bankruptcies, liens and judgments. Conducting this search will give you peace of mind.

There are some dishonest characters out there, protect yourself by getting all the facts up front.

1) Are they married or divorced?

2) What type of assets or debts do they have?

3) Do they have a criminal record?

4) Do they have any kids?

5) Do they have any pending lawsuits?

No question online or off it is important to be on your guard but with internet dating being on your toes has never been as important as it is today. One of the major benefits to hooking up online is also one of its most glaring drawbacks. The enigma of being anonymous has many people running wild but it has become an incredible tool for online scammers.

Most search specialists can conduct a background search confidentially. You probably do not want the subject of the background check to know you are investigating their integrity. Yet taking the time to have a discreet, thorough background search can save you heartbreak or worse in the future.

You only have one heart, use it wisely!

Internet Dating can be very exciting, especially if you’re new to it. It can lead to some incredible off-line relationships, from lasting friendship to long-term love to sizzling sex encounters.

However, communicating with people over the Internet can also expose you to real danger if you’re not careful. Below are some tips to keep in mind when you start talking to people online.

In the talking phase:

Be Anonymous – When you’re first talking to somone you’ve met online, never give them your real name, phone number, home address, or real email address. It’s also a good idea to check with your Internet Service Provider to make sure your personal information isn’t listed in your online profile with them.

Use an alternate email service – Set up a second (or third, fourth, etc.) email address through one of the many free email services online. Below are the most popular ones. This adds another level of security to email communications between the two of you.

Hotmail

Yahoo! Mail

Google

Use common sense when creating your nickname – A nickname (nic) such as “hotmama1″ may get you more attention (of the kind you may not want) than you bargained for. Use a nickname that is not gender specific when joining discussion groups, chat rooms, and message forums.

Common Sense – Basically, use common sense when talking to people online. You wouldn’t give a stranger on the street, or even someone you met at a bar all your personal information, would you? Well, the same rules apply when talking to someone online.

After you’ve established the appropriate measure of trust, and you decide to meet someone you’ve met online, check out Internet Dating Safety Tips Part 2 – The Meeting Phase for additional tips to consider.

While meeting the mate of your dreams from the comfort and privacy of your personal computer may be a welcome idea, it is not without its dangers. More and more cases of sexual predators, pedophiles as well as a host of other vices are springing up by the day.

Before getting too carried away with someone you meet online, you may want to consider the following factors and rethink your situation. It should occur to you that the person may actually be married, looking for some extra fun on the side; in this kind of a situation you only end up feeling wasted and disappointed for having wasted your feelings on people who have no space for you legally in their lives. With intentions of varying nature, women overseas run scams against men. They pretend to be attracted to them and ask for money. Needless to say, they disappear the moment they get the money.

The person you are chatting to online maybe anything as far as character is concerned. Remember, you don’t know them personally! Mothers are making headlines daily with cries of being stuck with pedophile partners who they met on internet chat rooms and dating sites. Needless to say we have all heard of the rampant cases of date rapes and even kidnappings occuring when people meet strangers they thought they knew well from the internet. With people like this lurking everywhere on the internet, it is imperative that users be aware of measures to avert possible dangers. Some of these measures include:

1) Follow your instincts. If the general gut feeling is that the person you are talking to is suspicious, trust this feeling and cut all communication immediately.

2) Never give out your personal information until you are sure it is safe.

3) Use a safe site; that is, one that is primarily concerned with the safety of its clients by enabling ways of weeding out potentially dangerous users say for example those with previous criminal records.

4) Do not give your personal contact details eg telephone numbers (even cellphone numbers), addresses etc. With todays technology finding somebody through a phone number is a matter of only a few clicks over a period of several seconds.

5) Learn some self defense skills. You might be accosted physically and these will come in handy.

6) Do not talk about your kids online, post their pictures or divulge any information about them, say for example what school they attend and the likes.

7) When going out on a date for the with someone you met online, ensure that you meet in a public place at a “safe”

hour.

Ensure that you have your own means of transport to and from the venue of the date. Do not under any circumstances let the person drive you home.

9) Be wary of people who ask weird intrusive questions and remember that you do not have to answer anything that could put you in danger.

10) If you have to meet outside your locality take extra care especially if you are flying to a place you have never been to before. Make sure at least one person close to you knows the full details of the plans to go meet the person and also about the person you are meeting.

For many people, their faith is a very large part of their lives and their identities. Their faith is the single most important factor that they use to determine the personal choices that they make from day to day and is most assuredly the single most important factor that they use to base their personal relationships upon.

A person who considers their Christian faith and beliefs to be of the utmost of importance, would never consider marrying outside of their faith. And, as we all know, dating is the forerunner of marriage. These people only want to date others who share their beliefs both online and off.

So when a Christian decides to participate in online dating, as more and more do each day, they will often seek out sites that are devoted specifically to those who share their beliefs who wish to date online. They believe (sometimes mistakenly) that the other members of the online dating site that they have joined are also Christians and hold the same beliefs sacred that they do.

Christians, as a whole, are honest people who believe that other people who say that they are Christians are also honest people. However, people can learn to parrot principles and ideas and to hold long and detailed discussions about the Bible. They do these things simply to appear to be a Christian that another will believe and accept at face value.

The important things that those who are using Christian online dating sites need to remember is that you just can’t believe everything that you are told. Just because another unseen and unknown-to-you-person can quote the Bible and claim to live by Christian principles, doesn’t make it so.

The very same safety precautions should be used on Christian online dating sites as one would employ on a general online dating site. Just because you have met your online dating partner on a Christian online dating site doesn’t mean that he or she really are what they claim. Unless and/or until a relationship has developed over a period of months (NOT days or even weeks) one should never:

(1) Give out personal information…not a real name, not the city of residence or birth, not an address or a telephone number and not an ISP email address.

(2) The chat service that is provided by the Christian dating site should be used rather than other chat services.

The Internet is only as anonymous as a user allows it to be. There are safety features that are afforded by all online dating sites, including Christian online dating sites. These safety features are there for the protection of the users, but using them is optional. Please ensure that you use them.

The Internet provides a great way to meet new people. However, there are also many scam artists. Take your time and take the necessary steps to protect yourself. It will be well worth your time and effort in the long run.

Is online dating safe or not? Let’s take a look at what the dangers are and determine whether online dating safety is actually a reality.

Identity theft is a growing trend with online dating therefore it may or may not be a good idea for some people. Although you will find risks to online dating you will also find many benefits that may outweigh the risk. Being informed will help you keep away from the downsides.

The Big Problem – Privacy and Security

Considered one of the biggest problems in online dating safety – privacy and security. You will find sites that will not guarantee the privacy of a user. Always look for the posted site warnings, normally in small print at the bottom of their site stating “privacy policy”. It’s highly recommended that you read the policies to be certain you know and understand what the site is about. If the site will allow non-members to view registered member profiles and/or personal information you can be fairly certain that this site has a lack of online dating safety. Any site that would allow this is definitely not recommended.

Being Careful About Identity Theft

Always remember that people can become hackers by using the Internet, when registering with an online dating service you expose yourself to these types of people who are looking for your personal information. Committing crimes with other people’s identity is one of the main purposes these criminal personality types register with online dating services. Some hackers have the ability to figure out just enough information to obtain members credit card numbers and pin numbers and use this information to make purchases under their name.

A Word About Fraud

What should you look for to determine if fraud is taking place? One example would be the online dating site owner taking money from users that pay for certain services yet the member never receives the promised service. Another warning sign would be if one member asked another member to pay for the trip to meet each other in their hometown, yet the member would keep the money and not show up at the meeting place.

Cyber Stalking

Stalking is a major problem in online dating safety because members of the site can obtain information on a personal nature through the dating service. It would be very easy to turn this information around and use it to injure or harass the members. While its true that the Internet has made it easy for cyber stalkers, online dating is not to blame for the cyber stalking, it just makes it easier. Cyber stalking was not even considered a threat until recent world events.

You should always take online dating safety extremely serious. Always take the utmost precautions. Never forget that people can be anyone or anything they want to be online, including someone that could possibly hurt you. Never believe everything people tell you.

Atlantic City, NJ – Recently, the online dating industry has taken a hit concerning the safety of its members. A New Jersey police officer offers important online dating tips that can help online dating members keep themselves safe.

Police Officer Kenneth Bachman from Egg Harbor Township, NJ is very familiar with the online dating industry. Bachman is an eight year veteran of the Burlington County Sheriffs Office in Mount Holly, NJ. In April of last year, Bachman started a company called Shore Network Connections, LLC. Shore Network Connections is host to one of the only online dating websites on the internet dedicated solely to the men and women behind the badge. Additionally, Bachman has had the opportunity to investigate cases involving online predators.

Bachman offers some general rules that must be followed when utilizing an online dating website. Fist, never expose your personal information such as your name,address,phone number,etc to any other members until you get to know the person you are dealing with better. This is to insure your overall safety and well being. Generally most people online are basically harmless and sincere, but the internet does possess its’ share of bad characters. So act appropriately and be smart and cautious when dealing with people online. Second, be careful when choosing your online name. Pick a neutral gender name if you don’t wish to invite uninvited sexual advances online or sexual innuendo. However if your intention is to invite advances from the sexes, then be prepared for the potential deluge of advances. Third,

be very careful when meeting in person. When you feel the time is right, and meeting in person is appropriate, always meet in a public place with a group of friends. Never meet the person for the first time by yourself. By having your friends this presents a secure picture of support. If this person is worth it they will honor your request. Lastly, trust your instincts.

If your instincts are trying to inform you that something may be wrong, listen to them. If you are uncomfortable for any reason then this could be a sign to steer clear. If this person isn’t your type then let them know immediately. Remember there are all types of people and personalities online and people emotions should be respected.

These are just a few simple, but important rules to keep your online dating experience safe. There are also screening services on the market that offer background investigations on your date. You may have to spend a few dollars for the service, but you can be assured of your safety. Shore Network Connections LLC, a company whose ventures also include BadgeVacations.com, offering discounted travel rates to emergency service personnel and TheBadge.org, a singles community for Emergency Services Personnel received the “Online Safety Award” in 2006.

For More Information Contact:

Kenneth J. Bachman

(609) 338-4158

http://www.thebadge.org

There is something about meeting that special person online and being pleasantly surprised as the conversations between the two of you flow more naturally. You discover the other person so easy to talk with that you find yourself sharing more details about your life than you have ever done with any of your previous relationships; whether they were online or off.

The times between logging off to take care of business and logging back on to reconnect with each other passes way too slow for your liking. And it’s pretty obvious that they enjoy it also. The online chats last for hours. Even then it seems like the two of you can go on for a lot longer.

So what’s wrong with that? Nothing if both parties continue to initiate the messages on an equal basis. But all too often, it becomes a one way street in that one person starts to do way more messaging than the other one. Sure the two of you may be still under the impression that the relationship is still on that plateau of almost limitless discussions and chats.

But time has a way of removing the rose colored glasses that come with relationships and emotions and replacing it with candid observation and analysis.

Too much messaging could mean:

1. Desperate

At first it was such a wonderful discovery how much you too had in common. Now due to excessive messaging it strikes you that maybe you both have a little TOO much in common. You agree on almost everything. Now even with being restrained in the number of times you contact each other, the two of you really may be that compatible.

However when it feels like there is no time to digest the information from the previous conversation before a new message pops up, then that just opens the door to the thought that maybe one of you wants this relationship a little too much.

2. Needy

How are their emotions doing when you do not get back to them post haste? Do they start to gush a little too much about how they missed you. Or do they get agitated?

This can take many forms such as sarcasm, becoming less talkative or just letting you know how upset they are that you didn’t get back to them. If they are having a hard time dealing with the fact that you have a life outside of cyberspace then tread lightly.

3. Personal Darkness

Yes this is extreme; unfortunately it has been known to happen. Too many messages can mean they are trying to drag you into their own private nightmare. That could be anything from running a scam to separate you from your money or something more sinister.

Thankfully it’s not a common occurrence but when it comes to dealing with someone who for all intent and purposes is still a total stranger, you have to take extra steps to guard your safety.

Your online relationship might be the real deal and lead to something wonderful between the two of you. But it’s hard to assess that if there is no breathing space to allow the natural give and take of the relationship to flow.

Even if your internet dating partner is not desperate, needy or trying to drag you into their own personal insane asylum, both of you are still jeopardizing the relationship.

Too much of a good thing too fast can eventually make you sick of it. You may like hamburgers and hate hot dogs but after a steady diet of overindulgence, the hot dogs start looking better and better to you.

If you’ve been wondering about how to get started with dating online, there is plenty of information on the internet that will help you to get started. Before you do you must keep a safety first attitude.

Here are 4 dating online safety tips to read before you get started with internet dating.

One: You must pick your online dating site carefully. You need to make sure that you check them out thoroughly. Read everything you find and find out what other people are saying about that site.

It is important that you find a dating site online that is legitimate before you use them or before you give them any money for membership. With all of the choices available to you this is easy to do.

Two: Always think about your safety first. Keep your personal information private, for now. You can give out your name if you want to but don’t let people know what your address or phone number is.

You can decide to give that to them later if you have a budding romance with them. Otherwise, keep this information to yourself. Because dating online can be be exciting it is easy to forget this simple tip!

Three: Always be honest and always be you. When you are talking to someone on a dating site, you do not want to lie and you want to keep your profile honest too. You also don’t want to act like someone you are not.

If you do this all the time then you will eventually forget who were acting like with someone or what lies you have told. Then you’ll become known as someone who cannot be trusted. Trust is one of the most important things about internet dating, so always be honest and yourself.

Four: Be patient and persistent. You may not find yourself that perfect someone on the first date. So you move on until you do. It may take some time but if you are patient and persistent than you will eventually find someone special that you can have a relationship with.

Consider that there are millions of people now involved in online dating so there is no need to get in a rush and there is no need to give up to quick either. There is someone for you out there, you just need to find them.

This is 4 dating online safety tips to keep in mind. Keep safety first, be honest, be patient, and look around for the right dating site before you join.

If you’re planning on joining an Internet dating service, it is very important that you learn some basic online dating safety precautions.

Although there are a lot of good and honest people online, unfortunately, just like in the real brick and mortar dating world, there are also predators. For this reason, you must take the necessary steps to protect yourself and ensure your safety.

Generally speaking, online dating safety is simply a matter of good old common sense. For example, you wouldn’t hand out your personal information to a stranger that you meet on a street, and the same should be true of people you meet while dating on the internet.

Here are some basic guidelines to protect you while dating online:

* NEVER provide your real name in the beginning. Take your time to really get to know the person you’re talking with before revealing this information. This should take months and not weeks or days. If the person you’re talking with is for real, they will also want to take things slow and not exchange personal information too quickly.

* NEVER provide the city in which you live or were born, as this will also enable them to track you down.

* NEVER use your ISP email address or use chat programs, such as ICQ or AIM, as this will reveal your true identity. This information can be used to find the exact location in which you reside.

Instead, always use the email and chat system that your online dating service provides or use a free email account, such as Gmail, Hotmail or Yahoo.

* NEVER reveal your place of employment. This includes both the name and location. If you tell the person you are dating online exactly what company you work for, you have provided information that makes it possible for them to get your home address as well as your telephone number. They can simply call the personnel office at your place of employment and get that information by pretending to be a police officer or they can send written communication that looks official enough and get the information in writing. They could also be waiting for you when you get off work.

Instead, you can tell them that you are a ‘Legal Secretary’ a ‘General Contractor’ or whatever – just not the name of your company or employer.

* If you have children, NEVER reveal the school your children attend, as this information can also be used to track you and your children down.

* Avoid giving out specific information about you and your life. Simply do not name specific places or events that will make it possible for a determined online dating partner to locate you or your family. For example, if you mention that you’re going to the balloon festival, they may automatically know that you’re referring to the Albuquerque, New Mexico balloon festival.

After you take the time to get to know someone, which should take a period of months, not weeks or days, and you decide that you’re ready to meet in person, do so with caution. Always make sure that your first face to face meeting is in a public place during daylight hours. It is also a good idea to keep the first meeting very short. For example, instead of going out for dinner, meet for a cup of coffee.

By taking a few simple precautions, you can have a safe online dating experience and even meet the person of your dreams. Remember, if the person you’re interested in is sincere, they will have no problem with you taking these precautions. It’s the predators that will have the problem and they will move on to an easier target.

We’ve all heard about them, sometimes its hearsay, sometimes its first hand. But dating disasters have been a part of courting since getting to know someone became a prerequisite to having a relationship with them.  Pre internet, there were a whole range of potential dangers to dating. When dating, you are getting to know someone. This in itself entails you do not know them, yet you are spending time with them. This creates a risk which, when gone wrong turns into a dating disaster. Most of the time a dating disaster is benign and we lose is a few hours, but hopefully gain a lesson in life and love. Sometimes though, a dating disaster is not so benign and we are actually in some sort of danger, either physically or financially. It is from these experiences that dating disaster legends are born. Unfortunately, in their infamy, these legend have enough power to turn people away from looking for love and happiness.

When internet came to dating, nothing really changed. For someone who is interested in finding love, at some stage you have to meet people in real life and spend time getting to know them. The only thing the internet changed was the method of introduction. Unfortunately though, many people don’t have the sense to understand this. As such, when using the internet and dating sites to meet people, the following two mistakes are common:

You believe using the internet to meet and communicate with people is actually getting to know them. Therefore, when the real life meeting occurs, you have a false belief the potential partner is already “known” and therefore dispense with your typical early dating precautions.
When things go wrong, you blame the internet as the medium, rather than the fact that the person you were dating was just wrong for you. Thats where such sayings as “He must have been a freak, that’s why he is on the internet” come from.

These mistakes are often exacerbated by a number of niche (but very popular) dating sites in the adult dating industry, where finding a no strings sex partner (or partners…) is called dating. It is not dating. In fact, internet dating itself is not dating. All online dating sites are, are introductions services. An internet dating site is the same as a newspaper ad, or singles personals in a magazine, or a pre internet singles party. It is a forum where you can meet people, get their contacts, and that is all. The more you understand this, the safer your dating experiences will be and the more successful you will be in finding your partners.

At Dating Down Under, we put safety in dating first. How can you have a successful dating experience if it is not a safe dating experience? For this reason you’ll find a plethora of tips and guidelines about safety and online dating throughout the website. Make sure you visit our website for more tips and information. Generally though, the following guidelines are essential:

Recognise that internet dating is only an introductions service. While communicating with email, chat and IM may be fun, it is NOT getting to know someone.
Recognise that certain internet dating sites attract certain types of “undesirable” people. So research specific sites before you join them. Our Dating Site Reviews are are good place to start your research.
Use internet communications as an initial screening process, but not at the expense of your usual real life screening processes and common sense
When you progress your dating into the real world (Ie. when you decide to really meet someone you found on the internet) recognise the person you have been communicating with may have been a facade. So approach the situationwith the same caution you would with any first date. And start to get to know the person. YES. This is your first date. NO. Those long chat room sessions were not.
If you are ever unsure, particularly in the early stages, put safety first.
Don’t give up because of a bad experience. Remember, all the internet is, is another place to meet people. You could just as easily have met this “bad experience” at a bar, sports event, church or social group.